(7) The family situation of the Dostoevsky family full of guests and Mrs. Anna suffering from wife-baiting by her relatives as a newlywed.
We have looked at Dostoevsky's financial situation, his epilepsy, and other problems he faced, and finally we will look at his family environment. In fact, it was this family environment that was the most difficult for Anna's newlywed life. One might think that wife-baiting is a common occurrence, but this is the Dostoevsky family, and they are not known for their straightforwardness. As one might expect, Anna's family was not a simple one, and she had to endure many hardships.
Let us first look at Dostoevsky's family environment.
It was during this miserable week that the first weeks of our married life were ruined, and the unpleasantness and quarrels began, forcing us to remember our "honeymoon" with a sad and regretful feeling.
For the sake of clarity, let me describe my new life. Fyodor Mihailovich worked at night and was late getting up because he could not fall asleep early enough to read his books. I would get ready by 10:00 a.m. and go with the cook to Sennaya Square to do some shopping. （I would get ready by ten o'clock and go with the cook to Sennaya Square to do the shopping.)
When I returned home at eleven o'clock, my niece Katya Dostoevskaya would usually be there. She was a very pretty girl of about fifteen, with beautiful black eyes and two long, bright flaxen pigtails hanging down her back. Her mother, Emiliya Fyodorovna, told me several times that Katya liked me and wanted me to train her. Even though I knew it was a request, I couldn't help but respond that I should give her as much and as often as possible. Katya had nothing to do and was bored at home, so she came straight from her morning walk to our house. It was easy for her to come because she lived five minutes from our house. By noon, Misha Dostoevsky would arrive, in search of Pavel Alexandrovich. He was a seventeen-year-old boy, my husband's nephew, who was stopping by on his way home from violin lessons at the Conservatory. Of course, I save breakfast for him. My nephew Fyodor Mikhailovich, an excellent pianist, was also a frequent visitor. At two o'clock, my husband's friends and acquaintances would begin to gather. They knew that my husband was not working urgently at the moment, so they were willing to come occasionally. Often, Emiliya Fyodorovna would show up for dinner, and Nikolai Mikhailovich, her husband's brother, would arrive. Her sister, Alexandra Golenovskaya, and her boyfriend, Nikolai Ivanovich, also came. After dinner, everyone usually stayed until ten or eleven o'clock in the evening. Every day was like this, and there was never a shortage of strangers and relatives in our home.
Misuzu Shobo, Anna Dostoevskaya, translated by Hiroshi MatsushitaDostoevsky in Recollection."P118-119
I am sure you must have been surprised to see how many people appeared in this book. It is not necessary to remember each and every name here, but I am sure that you can get an idea of how many guests the Dostoevsky family had. Every day, Anna would leak the following words to her husband: "I was so happy to see you.
I myself grew up in a family that loved to have guests, but they came only on Sundays and holidays. So it was a pain to have to "entertain" and "serve" them from morning till night, and to have to deal with them "incessantly. And it was even more painful for me because the younger members of the Dostoevsky family and my son-in-law were far from my age and not what I had in mind at that time. On the contrary, my husband's friends, acquaintances, and literary colleagues-Maykov, Averkiev, Strahov, Milyukov, Dolgomoschev, and others-were very interesting. I was curious about things in the literary world that I had never heard of before. I wanted to talk and discuss with these people and, if possible, listen to what they had to say. Unfortunately, this was rarely possible. When my husband saw that the young people were bored, he would whisper to me. Take them over there and do something to entertain them. So I would come up with an excuse, take them out, and "entertain" them with something that they were patiently waiting for.
The constant stream of customers left me no time to do the work I loved, which was a great loss for me, but it was also frustrating. I had not read a single book for a whole month, and I had not studied shorthand regularly, which I really wanted to perfect in my mind. It was a frustrating thought.
But the hardest thing for me was that I could not spend time alone with my beloved husband because I was always busy with guests. Whenever I had a few moments to spare during the day, I would go to my husband in his study, only to have someone come in or call him to do some household chores. I stopped talking to him as if I had forgotten the conversation with him last night, which I had cherished so much. After a long day of chores and chatting with many guests, at night, both my husband and I would become tired, and I would fall asleep while he would turn to an interesting book to help him catch his breath.
Misuzu Shobo, Anna Dostoevskaya, translated by Hiroshi MatsushitaDostoevsky in Recollection."p119-120
When my husband saw that the young people were bored, he would whisper to me, "Hey, Arnetka, they are bored. When my husband saw that the young people were bored, he would whisper to me: "Hey, Arnetica, they are bored.
Dostoevsky's words clearly reflect his view of family at the time and what he wanted for his wife. Dostoevsky asked Anna to entertain his guests without any malice toward her. But he could not yet realize that he was hurting her. What an irony that he is able to enter so deep into the human psyche in his novels, but is unable to see the feelings of his wife, the person closest to him. But perhaps this is the tragedy of human beings in all ages and cultures.
The Dostoevsky family was full of guests, but it was not these guests that were the most difficult for Anna to deal with. The enemy was within.
In her "Recollections of Dostoevsky," Anna wrote a chapter titled "Enemies in the Household," in which she describes the "wife-snatching" that she suffered most during her new marriage. Let us now take a look at the wife-snoring that Anna suffered the most during her honeymoon.
However, over time I could have grown accustomed to this life and found some freedom and time to do the work I liked, had it not been for the unpleasantness of my husband's relatives. My brother-in-law, Emiliya Fyodorovna Dostoevskaya, was a good but thoughtless woman. After her husband's death, she and her family were taken care of by Fyodor Mikhailovich, who took her for granted. She was greatly shocked when she learned that Fyodor Mikhailovich wanted to marry her, and she continued to be hostile toward me throughout the engagement. After the wedding, she realized that this fact was undeniable and became rather amiable, especially after she saw how well I treated her children. She came over every day, acting like a full-fledged housewife, and was always giving me attention for my housework. This may have been out of kindness and for my benefit, but it was always her husband who taught me. But she always taught me in the presence of my husband, and what I didn't like was that she would deliberately make him see how bad the housekeeping was and how uneconomical it was. What was even more annoying was that he would always bring up his ex-wife's example and point out my inadequacies compared to hers.
Misuzu Shobo, Anna Dostoevskaya, translated by Hiroshi MatsushitaDostoevsky in Recollection."p120-121
Dostoevsky's brother Mikhail died suddenly in 1864. Dostoevsky took care of his wife and children. His wife is the Emiliya spoken of here. If Dostoevsky married her, their remittances might decrease, which would be a problem. That is why he made Mrs. Anna an enemy of his eyes.
But there was an even greater threat than this snoring of Mrs. Emiliya. It was the presence of Pavel, the stepdaughter of Dostoevsky's ex-wife Maria.
Pavel is not Dostoevsky's biological son.(1) A brief introduction to Dostoevsky (1821-1866, "from birth to around the time of Crime and Punishment") before he met his wife, Anna.As I told you in the article "The first wife Maria had a child with her ex-husband. That child is this Pavel.
But Dostoevsky loved Pavel. He spoiled him too much...and because of that, Pavel became a spoiled and unreliable man. Reality is stranger than fiction.
Mrs. Anna describes Parvel's personality as follows.
Emiliya Fyodorovna's frequent reminders to me and her somewhat senior tone were unpleasant, but Pavel Alexandrovich's rudeness and impertinence were unbearable.
I knew that if I married, Fyodor Mikhailovich's son-in-law would have to live with me. We could not afford to live separately, and my husband wanted to keep him under his own influence while his character was still developing. I was young and did not feel uncomfortable with a stranger coming into our new household. Moreover, my husband loved my son-in-law so much and was so familiar with him that I thought he was reluctant to say goodbye because it was too hard for him to leave. On the contrary, I thought that he was just like me.counter for years (following a number in the hito-futa-mi counting system)It seemed that having one of the "Mere Old Man" in the house would teach me about my husband's various habits (many of which I did not yet know), and thus I would not have to disturb his conventional life so much.
Pavel Alexandrovich was only a few months younger than me.
I do not want to say that Pavel Alexandrovich Isaev was a stupid or mean person. What was most unfortunate for him was that he did not know the position he was in.never (in sentence with neg. verb)What he did not understand. From an early age, he had become so accustomed to the kindness and favor shown to him by his relatives and by his husband's friends that he took it for granted, never understanding that such kindness was due more to Fyodor Mikhailovich than to himself. Instead of being grateful for the attention he received from his favorites, he behaved carelessly, and his sloppy and brusque attitude toward everyone only saddened and angered them.distance between outstretched thumb and middle finger (approx. 18 cm)The fine Malykov, in particular, was often displeased by Pavel Alexandrovich, but put up with it. In particular, the magnificent Malykov put up with Pavel Alexandrovich's frequent discomforts (for Fyodor Mikhailovich's sake, of course) and took care of him in every way, but unfortunately it was not worth it.
Let me give you an example that well describes Pavel Alexandrovich. When we returned from abroad, he asked my husband for a job at the Volsko-Khamsky Bank. My husband asked Lamansky and his wish was granted, and he worked first in Petersburg and later in Moscow. At the bank, he told everyone that his "father" Dostoevsky was close to Ramansky and that he had many powerful connections. Once, when Ramansky was passing through Moscow, he stopped by the bank. Since Ramansky wielded great power as head of the State Bank, the bank welcomed him with open arms. Upon learning of his arrival, Pavel Alexandrovich came to the hall where the bank presidents were gathered, walked up to Ramansky, held out his hand, and said, "Hello, Evgeny! Hello, Evgeny Ivanovich. You probably don't remember me. I am Dostoevsky's son. You must have seen me many times at my father's." "I see you, my dear," said Pavel Alexandrovich, laughing, "you have changed so much. You, too, have changed a lot, haven't you? He patted Ramansky on the shoulder in a friendly manner. Ramansky looked at him uncomfortably, but he was a very polite man, so he asked him if Fyodor Mikhailovich was well. Yes, well, the old man is getting by," Pavel Alexandrovich replied. Finally, Ramansky lost patience and turned away. Pavel Alexandrovich thought that this kind of rude behavior would influence his boss.
He always referred to his husband as "father" and referred to himself as if he were his "own son," but he had the same dismissive and obnoxious attitude toward his father-in-law. He was born in Astrakhan in 1846, and his husband did not leave Petersburg until 1849, so he could never have been his own son.
Pavel Alexandrovich, who had been raised and cared for by his husband since he was twelve years old, was convinced that his "father" should live, work, and earn money only for himself. He himself did nothing to help his husband or make his life easier, but on the contrary, irritated him with his thoughtless behavior and thoughtless attitude, which, as all his relatives admitted, caused him to have fits. Pavel Alexandrovich, who called her husband "an old, out-of-date man," called her husband's desire for her happiness "absurd," and professed it to his relatives. In his eyes I was a usurper. He also saw me as a woman who had forced her way into our home, where he had always been able to be completely at home, because he was too busy with his literary work to take care of the housework. Only in this light could I understand his malice toward me. When he saw that he could not prevent our marriage, he tried to make it unbearable for me. He hoped that if I constantly harassed him, argued with him, and slandered me to my husband, they would fall out and possibly get a divorce.
Misuzu Shobo, Anna Dostoevskaya, translated by Hiroshi MatsushitaDostoevsky in Recollection."p121-122
We will continue to see some of this treatment of Pavel in the biography by Madame Anna, "Dostoevsky in Recollection," many, many times in the years to come.
Pavel Alexandrovich's wicked tricks were endless. On one occasion, he drank the cream before Fyodor Mikhailovich appeared in the dining room, and had no choice but to send him to the store in a hurry to buy some, but of course they were of poor quality. In the meantime, her husband had to wait for his coffee. One time, we ate all the birds right before dinner, and we were stuck with only two birds for the three of us. Sometimes matches disappeared from the house, whereas there had been several boxes of them last night. Each time, my husband would get very annoyed and scold Fedorja, but the one who had caused the mess would shrug his shoulders and say, "Hey, Dad, I'm going to go to the house. When I was in charge of the house, we didn't have this mess, did we? It was all my fault, or more precisely, my poor housekeeping.
Pavel Alexandrovich's ways were usually very specific. Where my husband was present, he was extraordinarily attentive to me, handing me a plate, calling for a maid, or picking up a dropped napkin. Seeing this, my husband said more than once that thanks to the women, especially me (he had avoided getting to know Katya and Emiliya Fyodorovna, as he had avoided getting to know them), Pavel Alexandrovich had improved and his manners were getting better and better.
However, his attitude toward me changed as soon as my husband left the room. One time, in front of others, he criticized my housekeeping, saying that everything had been fine before. One time he told me that I spent too much money, even though the money belonged to "all of us. At other times, he pretended to be a victim of abuse in the family, saying that I was in a difficult position as an "orphan" when I had lived a happy and respected life in the family. -Suddenly the stranger (me? My wife?) The new housewife came to the house and said, "I'm an orphan," and she was in a difficult position. The new housewife began to bully, harass, and torment her "son. She looks at him with disapproving eyes every time he eats, and he is unable to eat with ease. She would say things like, "How happy I was before, I wish it would happen again, I don't want her to be my father," and so on. The younger members of the Dostoevsky family were not strong enough to defend me. The older ones laughed at him, but only when they tried to defend themselves.
To prevent her "father" from being taken from her, Pavel Alexandrovich went into the study almost every morning as soon as her husband started reading the newspaper. Occasionally, Pavel Alexandrovich would hear his husband's scolding voice and come running out of the study. He would get a little flustered and say that "Dad" looked busy and he did not want to disturb him. Other times, he would stay in the study for a long time, and then come out with his best attitude and tell a trembling Fedosha what he wanted to do. After they had talked like this, my husband would always say to me, "Arnetka, Parsha, what are you doing? After they talked like this, my husband would always say to me, "Arnetka, don't quarrel with Paasha. You shouldn't let him get to you, he's a nice young man. When I asked him why he was so upset with me and what he had said, he would say, "It's all a bunch of nonsense that people don't want to hear," and ask me to give him a break.
Misuzu Shobo, Anna Dostoevskaya, translated by Hiroshi MatsushitaDostoevsky in Recollection."p124-126
You must have thought this when you read this passage.
Dostoevsky, you're such a...!"
It was the same as when we left Mrs. Anna to deal with the incessant stream of guests. No, it was far worse than that.
He is completely unaware of what Pavel, who puts on a good face in front of his father, is doing behind the scenes.
And they don't even try to know how Mrs. Anna feels.
Dostoevsky, the demon of psychological description, is merely a helpless husband at home.
Mrs. Anna, who tastes loneliness and no one understands her, is finally mentally trapped.
Finally, like a glass of water overflowing, the time came.
She breaks down in tears of grief. This would be the beginning of their four-year wandering in Western Europe.
be unbroken
Next Article.
Click here to read the previous article.
Click here for a list of Dostoevsky's recommended books.
List of recommended Dostoevsky biographies."
List of recommended Dostoevsky commentaries.
A list of recommended commentaries on "Dostoevsky and Christianity."
Related Articles
